Just when you thought Orange County's windex waves were sketchy, The Darlings of Orange County are headed into the real, shark-infested waters: Hollywood. All The Darlings, and their cohorts, are headed to H-town: Veronica, Ryan, Chet, Tucker, Pardo and Astrid. If drugs, sex, veganism, duplicity and murder-by-fashion-doll don't belong in Hollywood, where do they belong?
Author and essayist Jennifer Susannah Devore Savannah of Williamsburg, San Diego Comic-Con Souvenir Book, is currently adapting her bikini-and-martini, summer beach-read novel to a screenplay. Hold on to your Uggs, kids. You're going to get sand everywhere!
Ideal production partners/storytelling stylists?
Orange County versus L.A.? Well, versus just about everybody? Please. It's a fun game to play; but they started it. Orange County was just sitting there, beachside in her lovely Escada pixie pants, having a Bombay martini, minding her own business and, without provocation, all those other snarky, nasty, jealous little counties started razzing her. La Pauvre! Authoress Jennifer Susannah Devore is one of her most ardent protectors in such silly, verbal contests, most oft set in a grungy bar somewhere other than The O.C. (Psst, we don't call it that.)
Within the pages of her novel, The Darlings of Orange County, she takes the opportunity to give it a direct S/O and, ever so politely, correct the "competition". (Really though, short of Monterey, Carmel and Santa Barbara, Orange County has no competition in California.) Love it or hate it, Orange County counts ... and it doesn't, by a very long stretch.
The Darlings of Orange County author Jennifer S. Devore has her well-polished finger on the pulse of Southern California: O.C. beaches, Newport shopping sprees, Laguna Beach dining, San Diego Comic-Con and the Del Mar Racetrack, just to name a few locales. As this year's Del Mar Opening Day (July 17, 2013) coincides beautifully with Comic-Con Weekend (July 18-21, 2013), it seems only appropriate that excerpts from Devore's bikini-and-martini, beach-read novel, The Darlings of Orange County make the rounds this summer. With chapters based on Comic-Con as well as Del Mar's Opening Day, she proffers you wee peeks into the scandalous, saucy, salacious world of her Darlings!
Excerpt from The Darlings of Orange County by Jennifer S. Devore
The weather couldn't have been more perfect if it had been written into a novel: 84 degrees, sunny, clear blue skies, Simpsons-clouds, a light breeze and zero smog. The ocean was sparkling and depending where you were that day, one could see not only Catalina, but also San Clemente Island. The day presented every feature possible for conditions air traffic controllers and pilots called clear and a million. Of course, this was Del Mar and on a summer's day, not to mention Opening Day, nothing less could be allowed. It was probably mandated by the San Diego City Council.
As San Diego Comic-Con 2K13 fast approaches, enjoy a very apropos excerpt from Jennifer Susannah Devore's The Darlings of Orange County. The setting: The Banshee Pub in Uptown Manhattan. The action: a meeting between our heroine Veronica Darling and her prospective, new agent, Darby Elliot Stone, Esq.
What's hotter than our Astrid in her trademark uniform of bikinis and Uggs? Astrid in a rat mask, of course!
Any question as to what the hottest couple in Encinitas, California, our very own Pardo and Astrid, (Of The Darlings of Orange County fame: book now $2.99!) will be up to this summer? Pack your Uggs and rat mask, Astrid. It's the annual Rat's Cup in Biarritz, France, along La Côte Basque. Bikinis, boards, booze and the Rat Patrol. Who knows? Maybe the Kia Soul Hamsters will even be there. Now that's a party even our Miss Savannah Squirrel might attend. Maybe.
What's hotter than our Astrid in her trademark uniform of bikinis and Uggs? Astrid in a rat mask, of course!
Any question as to what the hottest couple in Encinitas, California, our very own Pardo and Astrid, (Of The Darlings of Orange County fame: book now $2.99!) will be up to this summer? Pack your Uggs and rat mask, Astrid. It's the annual Rat's Cup in Biarritz, France, along La Côte Basque. Bikinis, boards, booze and the Rat Patrol. Who knows? Maybe the Kia Soul Hamsters will even be there. Now that's a party even our Miss Savannah Squirrel might attend. Maybe.
I spent a month in Biarritz one week. My Viking and I explored the beaches, bars and casinos with frightening speed and agility. It helps to have beaucoup d'euros; but ce n'est pas necessaire. The beach is the beach and a drink is a drink, no matter where you live or where you travel. To quote Ethan Hawke to Winona Ryder in 1994's Reality Bites, "You see, this is all we need. A couple of smokes, a cup of coffee and a little bit of conversation. You and me and five bucks."
Replace "smokes" with "Gin and Tonics" add a couple of rat masks and some bonkers wave action, symbolically speaking, of course, if you're not on the coast, and you've got the perfect day, en Biarritz, San Diego, Washington, D.C., Rome, Nashville, Seattle, Zermatt, Poipu Beach or anywhere your pin drops on this great blue marble map.
Salut, mes ratons! See you this summer!
Fresh from the art department once again, The Darlings of Orange County 2013 New Year's ads, Part 1: "Downright Filthy" & "Leaking Silicone".
This easy, breezy, beautiful day along the San Diego coast, I offer a delightful surprise, for me anyway: a humbling and downright awesome follow-up review to my Skype interview about The Darlings of Orange County with Natalie Wright. As I mentioned previously, Natalie calls 'em likes she sees 'em. Lucky pour Moi, she sees 'em a far cry from Fifty Shades of Grey. Phew!
Solstice or no, summer's here, my pretties and me thinks you folks need a smart, steamy, summer read and I'm just the gal to proffer such wordsmithing.
Voila! The Darlings of Orange County is yours for a mere $2.99 via Amazon's Kindle, for this Memorial Day weekend. Still not sure if you're ready to take on all the Hollywood, Del Mar, Encinitas, Moonlight Beach, south O.C. drugs, murder and salacious, mendacious satire The Darlings has to offer? Wrapped up in a warm sheet of knee-slapping, milk-spitting humour, like a meaty, spicy burrito from a Huntington Beach food truck, The Darlings has just what your core craves. See what these good folks have had to say about it!
One doesn't have to read The Darlings of Orange County during the summertime, but it's certainly the best time to do so! Author Jennifer Susannah Devore, best-known for her Savannah of Williamsburg historical-fiction series, waded deep into the skanky end of the pool for this bikini-and-martini novel. She tried something different, stretching far out of her comfort zone.
Drawing on inspiration from, among myriad, other sources, Arrested Development, 30 Rock and Sophie Kinsella's Shopaholic series, Jennifer S. Devore has crafted a seedy, surfy, silliy, sandy and sexy Orange County: a gauche glimpse into the O.C.'s (Don't call it that.) nipped, tucked and royally %ucked underbelly. If you think Bravo's The Real Housewives of Orange County is a tacky, cautionary tale, take note. The Darlings of Orange County is your best How Not to Succeed in Entertainment guide. Perfect for reading poolside with a frosty Tequila Sunrise, or on the beach with a classy, cranberry can of Sofia by Coppola Blanc De Blancs wine.
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From the start The Darlings of Orange County reads like a film: pirates, sexy Swedes, beautiful surfers, brooding femme fatale brunettes and volatile redheads running amok amidst the sunny and sandy shores and stores of Newport, Laguna and Dana Point. Natch, any writer will tell you their book should be a narrative film. Yet, clearly some scream for the marquis lights more than others. I mean, just look at the cover art!
Here's the question I posit to those of you whom have read the book: who do you envision in the various roles? Sure, many of the main and supporting characters are dysfunctional, self-obsessed, superego, mendacious murderers, drug dealers and all-around finks; yet, like any good Anne Rice novel, most of them are also hiding some innate goodness and are preternaturally beautiful, without aesthetic flaw. They are mathematically perfect specimens with hearts of bronze.
Suffice it to say there's an opening or two for the likes of Brad Pitt (Kalifornia-Brad, not Benjamin Button-Brad), Matthew McConaughey, Zach Galifianakas, Parker Posey, Adrianne Curry, Anne Hathaway, Ed Helms, Sofia Vergara and the like. Bien-sur, scribbled on a Hello Kitty piece of notepaper, I have my definitive actor wishlist: distinct actors paired with specific characters. Oh sure, I suppose I'll have to sign Johnny Depp, Robert Downey, Jr., Conan O'Brien and some of the other stars dotted throughout the pages. Still, who's your John Everyman playing Pardo, Ryan or Tucker; who's the Betty-next--door playing Veronica, Kieran, Astrid or Sasha?
As far as Chet Darling goes, the scruffy, sketchy, Captain Ronesque land-pirate who lives on a broken down yacht in Dana Point harbor, subsisting by making canvas covers for boats and costumes for Renaissance Faire folk? It's Zach Galifianakis (The Hangover, Muppets Most Wanted) and only Zach on my dream casting list.
Clearly, the title needs to lap dance on the right people. If you were the right lap, who would you cast? Head to Amazon's The Darlings of Orange County forum to see whom other readers envision and let your wishes and fantasies be known! If you're shy, you can even just write us a note here at our Contact page; we'll pass it along to Jerry Bruckheimer personally! Tell Hollywood it's time to bring some H-town sizzle to the shores of the O.C. (Psst. BTW, don't call it that.) Film rights still available. Tweet
For Immediate Release
The Darlings of Orange County Stings H-town with Sexy Salacious Satire
San Diego, CA - March 27, 2012 - Author, Jennifer S. Devore, will release her 4th book, a work of fiction, The Darlings of Orange County. The novel will be released in Kindle, Nook, and epub formats
Veronica Darling has an image problem; nobody knows who she is. To get noticed in the literary and entertainment worlds, she soils her soul to bring Hollywood to the California Riviera.
The Darlings of Orange County is a salacious, hysterical and murderous romp that's overflowing and pulsating, like a bikini top that's way too small, with eco-terrorism, horseracing scandals, sleazy drug deals and an obligatory lipstick-lesbian affair. It all leads to a white-knuckled climax in a glitzy, celebrity-encrusted, Laguna Beach film premiere that spells success for Veronica Darling and trouble for her friends and family.
Taking this playlist idea from a fellow author and friend, Natalie Wright of Emily's House fame, I thought it would be fun to share the soundtrack to my upcoming release. I never actually pondered the tuneage in my noodle, cohesively, as a soundtrack per se; yet, as music is integral to my daily life as well as to my writing, I absolutely had songs that not only played in my head as a running score, but are indeed referenced in the pages of The Darlings of Orange County. For those of you whom will be reading it (Thank you! Releasing next week!!), you'll note specifically in Chapter 54, wherein our heroine Veronica Darling does a guest spot on Imus in the Morning, she has ready her Five Fave songs: a standard requirement for all Don Imus interviewees. She also reveals she used to have a fave Gwen Stefani song, It's My Life ... until she learned on a show that it was also a fave of Alan Colmes and it was instantly tainted.
What you have to understand is that good writing isn't necessarily saleable, and a lot of people get rich writing awful bullshit. -Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in America
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(Warning to Savannah of Williamsburg readers, parents, teachers et al: please, note this is NOT a Savannah-title by any means, hence the need for user-registration. No kiddies allowed. Aside from the overall goal of awareness in a world of dwindling standards, it is an endeavour to dip my quill into a new genre. Adults will love it, I promise you ... your children must not. Book IV in the Savannah Series, however, is being written currently and is, as always, completely child-appropriate.)